July 13, 2011


There a moments, all the time--daily--that you could never imagine happening before you had a baby. Things that you never dreamt in your wildest dreams. Like your son trying to shut the toilet lid on your head while you barf, and laughing, laughing hysterically.

I ate too many gummi bears while reading Star* on the bus on the way home from teaching a workshop at the library. Real party 'til you puke territory. Fifth and sixth graders, coming up with band names and albums for their imagined groups and such, who they would tour with, album art. Everyone wants to tour with Lil Wayne. Today's highlights: Swagger Like Us, who will only tour with Cash Money artists, had three songs: "SLU theme", "Life Style" and simply "Basketball". Their album had the Polo logo on it, but it looked like a little giraffe standing on a poodle. My favorite was the group 'The Really Good Rapping Dogz" and their album was called 'The Wildest Dogz U Know". TRGRD gets points for telling people what to expect, and the upsell of the "really".

* Kim Kardashian information I learned today: She drives a Shadow, just like Ice-T. Her wedding is now going to cost an estimated 20 Million Dollars, which seems actually impossible unless she is buying wedding dresses for everyone attending and serving a 70 course tasting menu. She was going to have two weddings, splitting up her 1000 guests, but now she is only having one wedding for them all. Also, in profile, in a funny way she looks like Lionel Ritchie, but her head is a perfect, smooth egg-bulb shape, so maybe like Lionel Ritchie with a pantyhose covering over his face. If I was 20 and in art school right now, I would be dressing up as her and making video pieces where I roll on the floor and rip a spandex butt-shaper to shreds with my teeth.

Posted by jessica hopper at July 13, 2011 10:50 PM | TrackBack