May 27, 2009

BLESSED ART, THOU

As I dropped him off at City Hall to get fingerprinted for his new job, looking so clean and fancy in his summer suit, I wondered "why must Matt go be a lawyer?"--this is the man that just last night thought up "Purrtains:The Curtains Made of Real Live Cats Who Love Being Curtains" and "Himney: The Chimney For Him". Where is there a job in this world for people who love puns--thrive in puns--and dumb ideas?

I have been having nightmares, book anxiety nightmares mostly, that I go to my publisher's office, a cool store front/hairsalon in Brooklyn, which is inexplicably run by guitarist/author Peter Case of The Plimsouls. The staff is mad because I have written the book in English instead of Spanish. I cry "How was I supposed to know?" and they answer back "HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW, YESSICA?!" in thick Spanish accents, while washing the hair of elderly women in black bowl sinks. Peter Case opens box after box of my book in English, disappointed.

Shayla left me a message yesterday saying the book is for sale at the upscale supermarket by her house in Portland--which gave me comfort from the scolding Peter Case gave me.

Putting out the book, having it be almost all the way out, and having it be a thing I made, that is mostly me, made with some help (Anders drew the pictures, 20 ppl proofread, 5 ppl research-assisted) is totally all the way weird. I have put out a "magazineses" before, but that is different: I probably knew almost everyone buying a copy, we had 20-40 people writing for it sometimes. I promoted other peoples things they made for years. This is different. This is a book I wrote riding around in the grocery cart of a stranger. Matt is being very patient with me, as I have been pulling him from the edge of his sleep, or showers, or unrelated conversation with questions like "The people who bought my book on Amazon, it says they also bought The Frog Principle which is for little kids. What if they bought my book thinking it's for a six year old? Do you think they going to be mad?" Basically, totally freaked out crazy talk. BUT THATS NOT TO SAY THAT IF YOU LOVED FROG PRINCIPLE YOU WON'T LOVE MY BOOK AS WELL.

Posted by jessica hopper at May 27, 2009 11:37 AM | TrackBack