January 03, 2007

THE PLAGUE OF WHY?

Before JR and I went on our walk today, we were standing in the kitchen talking to Matt, and JR says 'Whats that guy doing on the roof?" and we turned around and look at the roof that is directly paralell to our kitchen window and there a guy, down on one knee, the other leg outstretched, his back to us, his hands in front of him, situated around this pipe-opening--like a vent --coming up from the roof. Matt supposed he was fixing the vent and Jr and I insisted "NO HE IS NOT, HE IS PEEING! HE IS PEEING INTO THE PEOPLES HOUSE!" and as we soon learned-- we were right! The urinater saw us, looked ashamed, kept pissing, then shook and zipped up and stood. He then walked towards the other end of the roof like he was inspecting it or something, all "la la la just making the rounds.." and then went back down the ladder.

I thought of the Robert Capa quote I read last night, about how every picture should ask a question. If there had been a picture of that man tinkling into the duct, it would ask many questions, for example:
1. why is he peeing into the duct?
2. is that his house?
3. if he just had to go RIGHT THEN, why did he not just piss on the roof?
4. does he know where that duct goes? and if so--is he doing it on purpose?
5. is that some weird fetish he has?
6. does his ex wife live there with her new boyfriend?
7. is he handyman and he just does that everywhere because he hates his job?
8. did he really just climb all the way up, with a ladder, onto the roof, to pee into the house?
9. what if he is peeing into his own house? what if that is a total strangers house? what if our roof / duct is next?
10. what is that duct for and where did the pee go?

I spent the beginning of our walk wondering all these outloud and then Matt and I wondered about it again later. Do I put a missed connection on Craigslist, warning my neighbors there is a mustachioed mystery pee-er up on the rooftop? It is a grade-a baffler!

Posted by Jessica at January 3, 2007 07:38 PM | TrackBack