January 13, 2005

COUNT CRUNKULA LOOKS FOR NEW NECKS TO SUCK

Even though I am 289% sure that i missed the comments deadline for the pazz and jop village voice 10k fun run, I am turning them in, via carrier pigeon today. I can tell you this much about writing it: Fuck music, my crosshairs frame tight my peergroup alone. Megafuck the crit-mass, and the editors they rode in on. I forgoed writing about the revolution in demurebass that Luomo did not bring in favor of writing about rockism, rape aestetics in the chorus and your and america's favorite: the casual rascism of the critical status quo.

(And the whole time I was writing, I had that annoying song that the candy sings at the beginning of the movie trailers in head ("lets go out to the lobby! lets go out to the lobby and buy ourselves a snack!"), lodged perma like some cornfritter in the dentures - which served to only triple my scathe.)

I do not know whether the anger is coming to, with this expectation I grew, like some crystalline fifth limb -- that music writing was and could be and should be this jubillant and relevent and insightful thing, it could be a slickery golden bridge of revelation, it could be so much more than a series of brill creem ads on the side of the county road, selling quietly. Anger over some dream deferred, maybe it's finding out that the patina does not rub off and the lamp is really just baby shit green and there is no amount of rubbing that's gonna change it. I always try bringing justice and girl plight into the scope, and it always screws things up, there is never room for it.

So, I'd like to have a toast: to four more years of a tender lapping of Cam'ron's cock n' balls, more fete'd jack-white saviours in the spotlight, more Jeff Tweedy Poco-tributes, more girls in corrective orthodontia hiking up their bra straps in the front row of Good Charlotte shows screaming for consumption, and to all those late night nights where we laboured, nay! toiled over - the articles and insightful sidebars about who the Beastie Boys were voting for . Cheers all around, kiddo - here's to a glorious 2005!

Posted by Jessica at January 13, 2005 03:43 PM | TrackBack